It's been a pretty lousy couple of weeks for the Sobel Soup. If you haven't noticed, my Villanova Wildcats were knocked out of the NCAA tournament by a Sandman, a miracle shot, and something that slightly resembles a human being. Making matters worse, Duke just advanced to the Final Four this weekend. Even though I have been harassed by a few fake Duke fans (it's only been one, actually: Clay Packel), but I have yet to hear from any of the main antagonists, such as J.D. Sparks XIV, Ibo DeGrouchy, or Fat Dub. No word on whether or not Jon Scheyer performed a Scheyer Face as he was cutting down the nets. You can bet it happened though, because Scheyer Faces are about as prevalent as Kyle Singler's zombie faces, which occur almost nightly.
In other tournament news, Ali Farokhmanesh shot his way into America's hearts, while simultaneously shooting down the Kansas Jayhawks, and the vast majority of this year's NCAA brackets, including mine. Even though the puns here are truly endless (not to mention inappropriate and very politically incorrect) I'm going to lay off.
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I missed a lot while I wasn't blogging. I even neglected to cover Christmas, and believe me, it was a doozy. Grandpop, Jeffrey J.'s dad, was over, along with the rest of the family, and he had some stories to tell about your friend and my favorite. Apparently Jeff used to be a free spirit back in his college days, and Grandpop told everyone about this. At first, he brought up Jeff's affinity for changing majors. Jeffrey J. claimed to only have changed "a few times," which I guess means six or seven to him. Grandpop really dropped the dagger when he informed us of the "Jeff Sobel Memorial Library." Apparently, Jeff was very fond of using the University of Delaware school library (read: he never stepped foot in the place). Grandpop called him foolish and Jeff was ashamed, but I had a Ron Burgundy-Baxter moment. It really just showed me how much of a boss Jeffrey J. truly was, and still is.
All this talk about Jeff's college days made Uncle Kevin bring up some new information too. Turns out Jeff used to be a Private Investigator. He was so good, he almost had his own show, but they gave it to Magnum instead. A little disappointing, but how can Jeff be expected to compete with a mustache like that? It would be like watching ESPN's college football coverage without Lou Holtz's lisp and humongous glasses, or watching Greg Oden play without his beard. Something's missing, so history is better off with Magnum anyway. Besides, Jeff's job wasn't really as glorious as it sounds. Even though he was always on stake-outs, he supposedly just sat there for hours. He didn't even get donuts. If it doesn't sound boring to you, just trust me when I say it was.
Also, I would be remiss if I didn't tell all of you about one of my favorite Jeff stories of all time. Late one night, I was walking downstairs. I heard a large ruckus, and assumed it was a television show. Once I turned the corner, I realized Jeffrey J. was watching something on his computer. It wasn't just any thing, though, because I kid you not, Jeff was red in the face and tears were just about ready to come from his eyes. I had no idea what the video was about, but I assumed it was some sentimental home video. My world was full of complete shock when I looked at the screen, and saw Susan Boyle's Britain's Got Talent tryout. I legitimately fell on the ground laughing, and could not stop until maybe 10 minutes later. Jeff was pretty embarrassed, and he couldn't look at me in the face for about 3 days afterwards. It's probably because everytime I saw him I asked how Susan was. But he totally deserved it.
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This post's video was sent in one of the blog's most faithful followers, Saumon Oboudiyat. Apparently he is a big Rush Hour fan, and this one makes him go "all aboard the ROFLCOPTER!!!" (Just so you all know, ROFLCOPTER actually means Rolling On the Floor Laughing Can't Operate Properly Til Eyes Refocus, but all the ballers use it as a laugh-mobile, like a helicopter of ROFL's) I do appreciate Chris Tucker's Michael Jackson impression, and he's got some nice dance moves to go along with it.
Always Serving,
Sobel Soup
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